in General

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Yesterday’s service was a moment Robyn and I will never forget. I walked into the sanctuary and saw a wall of balloons 20 feet high and 80 feet wide… with dozens of huge flower arrangements… a slideshow of Ezra playing… and then my eyes settled on the box Ezra’s earthly body will rest in from now on. I stood there and cried. I miss him. It hit me then he isn’t coming back. I know he’ll never leave us in our thoughts or actions, but we will never again see him here.

It was a beautiful day with nearly a thousand people in attendance. Robyn and I are honored to have had so many of you there. Dozens of you have emailed in – yes, we did shoot the entire service on video, and we will post it later this week for those who missed it. Friends and family flew in from all over the country. Friends and family here and from everywhere flooded our home with flowers, food, and cards.

I have said this before, and will mention it again as it’s heavy on my mind. I have spent over a decade heavily involved in the church, and I’ve seen how easy it is to lose our focus on living like Jesus did to a focus on programs and schedules. It’s easy to take the injustices done against us by Christians and twist them into something done to us by Christ. It’s easy to watch hypocritical hurting people like we all are judge others and in our own mind create Jesus with that same character. Some people call it being jaded.

In 14 months of struggle I have cemented in my mind the importance of living like Jesus did. I have been slammed to the floor with tears and questions time and again, and been awed by the generosity we’ve been surrounded by. I have stood back up constantly, and stayed standing the times I have by grace and love. I see the incredibly deep need for us to care for each other. For me to care for you, and you for me. I mean this in a global sense, not specific to myself. I want to thank you all for caring for my wife, my children, and myself. It comes in many forms, and we each reach out as we can. All you do impacts. I personally read EVERY one of the thousands of total emails, comments, and messages which come to us. You’ll have to excuse my lack of response if it was your experience – I simply can’t keep up with responding. Know though that we read these, and we keep them all. We’re incredibly grateful to all of you.

Many of you have approached us with fundraiser ideas, pledges to help, and actions you’re going about doing already to help the fight against childhood cancer. We are awed and feel a part of a move which will affect that battle heavily and positively. We ARE going to be starting a foundation to channel our efforts, hopefully by the end of the year. First we need a few weeks break. 😀 We’d be honored to have you fighting with us then. Once we’ve rested, we will put together something which I hope you will stand with us in to directly push towards a cure for childhood cancer. I hope you’ve seen it’s face, and I hope you’re angry. I hope you’ve seen it’s not always smiling children on a commercial, but is also broken families, extreme struggle, and painful loss. I hope you also know this is NOT an unbeatable foe. Many cancers have gone from a 50% survival rate or less earlier this century to close to 97% now. It just takes attention, time, and proper funding into proper research. We plan on working hard to make sure the focus is put in correct places, not just “cancer” as a broad term.

You should see Charley. We’ve been home(ish) this past week – well, crazy busy with planning Ezra’s celebration service, but home much more often than we had been. Charley is stronger than ever, over 17lb, and wearing the same size diapers Ezra did. He’s smiling a lot, and babbling like no tomorrow. He’ll most likely no longer need oxygen support by early December. He’s taking little bits of liquids orally now, so we’re moving towards getting the pump feeds to not be necessary. He is a good looking, strong little man. 2011 will be a strong new year for our family of 3.

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  1. Thanks for keeping us involved with your writing. We are always praying for you, Robyn and Charlie. I pray you all will be able to rest and relax as you grieve and that God will replenish your bodies and souls for your next part of this journey:)

  2. Rest my friend and know we stand ready to respond with you in this fight. Also know we continue to pray for strength and for God to be especially near to your family as you walk this road together. Grace and peace in abundance to you.

  3. Thanks for keeping us all up to date. I wish I had been there to see it all Kyle. Stay strong and keep on moving forward, you cant go wrong doing that.

  4. What a beautiful post. You brought tears to my eyes like you always do :). I think about you guys everyday. I was really sad that I couldn’t make it to Ezra’s celebration of life. I look forward to seeing the video later. Praying for your family. Lots of love to you all!

  5. I don’t know what to say. I’m at a loss for words. The testimony of your faith in the face of a loss such as this gives me chills. I too pledge to be one of the many who stands ready to fight this fight. You have my support, my prayers and my love. Yes, it is all about how we treat others, you are right. And trying to live, at least making a conscious effort, like Christ. Big shoes to fill…. God knew what he was doing when he chose you both to be Ezra’s parents. What a lucky little boy to have such an abundance of love in such a short amount of time. Yes, 2011 will be filled with the peace and joy that only God can provide. Ezra will never be forgotten and will watch over your family. Much, much love, respect and admiration to you and Robyn. I hope to be half of the parents you have been throughout this journey of hope, love, and faith.

  6. Lots of people have said it, but you are truly in my prayers. As a fellow Christ follower your writings here are inspiring. You hold nothing back from the truth of Jesus. Thanks you for sharing this humbling experience with us all the while keeping the faith.

    In His grip

  7. Thank you so much for taking the time to keep us updated. Little Ezra is constantly on my mind and especially my 5 yr old boy Jacob’s. Just two days ago he asked if he could make him a picture. I had to explained what happened. His look was of sadness, but his words reminded me of what out hope is “He is with Jesus now. He is not sick anymore”. Praying that our Lord’s peace continue to overflow in both you and Robyn, that you will grow stronger as a unit and shower little Charlie with heaps of love during this time of changes. Please know that you will remain in my prayers.

  8. I would like to first send all my deepest thoughts and prayers to you and your family. Your writing is so moving and has opened a window into childhood cancer I never knew about. I want to thank you for sharing sweet Ezra’s path and all his strength and your families strength towards cancer. Ezra’s story has made me realize certain things in my life and faith in God that I never looked at. I wish you all peace and grace.

    God Bles

  9. I have to say that I was blessed by the wonderful things I experience at Ezra’s celebration of life.

    The times I change his diapers, or took his temperature…or saw him running around the pods…

    Your son truly changed many life’s…I am proud to say I am one of them.

    My admiration and respect…now more than ever…I can only say thank you!!!

    PS. I am really happy for Charley’s improvement…please keep us update…I hope I can meet him some day.

  10. Ezra will always be in our hearts!!!! Rest in Jesus as Ezra is in His arms!!!! I am forever changed because of Your faith and strength through this unbearable time.

    Jesus is holding Ezra and he is not alone! Ezra is watching Jesus and He is holding you through it all!!! Be still and know that He is God as hard as it may be!!!!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bFOdA52sjFA

    Your family is loved!!!!!

  11. I honestly don’t know what to say. I sit in my car after receiving notification and reading your post with tears streaming down my face. My heart aches and I can only imagine how yours and robyn’s ache. I am floored byte strength behind the words you write. I pray that our Lord continues to hold your family in his arms and comforts and heals your pain. I pray for you all constantly, you are never far from my thoughts.

    Your sister in Christ.

  12. My deepest condolences to you and Robyn. I was unable to make it to Ezra’s celebration of life but my heart was there. Thank you so much for taping it so the ones like me that have been praying for Ezra and your family can see it. I know you are in deep pain. But remember these three words which will sustain you. GOD WILL HELP. He is there to comfort you and Robyn through this painful time in your life. My little girls are sad but they said that Ezra is in heaven playing with their two siblings that are up there. I will continue praying for you, Robyn and Charlie. (((HUG)))

  13. Rest and peace to you. My prayer is that you Robyn and Charlie have time to be refreshed and united together. Blessing as you go through the journey of grieving over the loss of children and the joy of discovering the newness of of another precious life to steward. May the grave and blessings of the Lord be on you!

  14. We are still bathing you all in prayer. I remember meeting you all for the first time in the clinic at St.Joes. I loved Ezra in his footy pj’s. I just wanted to squeeze him because he was so darn cute. Every time we had a chance to visit, your faith was evident in your speech. It is hard to see how God is good in something like this, but sometimes we won’t see it until later, or maybe never. Don’t forget how much He loves you and how much you all are loved by others. Keep you eyes poised to our Great God. Ezra was a sweety pie.
    Much love,
    coco lewis

  15. My deepest condolences to you, Robyn and the rest of your family.

    I learned of Ezra through Layla Grace Marsh’s FB page, and I cried many tears as I read through your blog. I’m saddened and angered by what children with cancer must go through. Not to mention the families that are there to support and care for these poor children.

    As I sat at church today, I prayed for you and for Ezra…that he is now healed and with his younger brother. I stand in awe of the faith you display. I remember first reading of Layla, and thinking the same thing of the Marsh family. They say it’s easy to have Faith in God, when all is going well…the truest test of Faith is when all is wrong in your world, and whether you’re Faith is strong enough to let you hand it all over to Him. I honestly don’t know if I could possess the same faith you do now, if I were faced with the challenges you faced. I’d like to think I would, but it’s not certain. I love God, believe in God, and pray that I am leading the life he meant me to live.

    Thank you for sharing Ezra with so many strangers, I know my life is changed for having learned of him and having him touch my heart.

    May God bless you, strengthen you, and provide the comfort that only He can. I will continue to pray for you, Robyn, and beautiful little Charley.

  16. What a beautiful post. Thank you for sharing your hearts and vulnerabilities with us and allowing us to support you in any way we are able.
    I’m a nurse at ACH. I’ve taken care of Charley and Ezra both and your family and your story has made an impact on me.I’m in awe of your strength and I’m sad that sweet boy isn’t physically with you anymore.

    Many of us at work were thinking of Ezra yesterday and remembering you. I wish I could have attended the celebration of his life, but those of us in the break room yesterday were there in spirit.

    Enjoy your resting time with Charley, it makes my heart happy to hear how well he is doing.
    God be with you all.

  17. Ezra’s Celebration of Life was absolutely beautiful yesterday. Thank you so much for allowing my family and I to be a part of it, and a part of your lives this past year. Ezra’s story has truly blessed so many people, as was so evident in the church yesterday. We are all still here fighting for him, praying for you, and ready to stand with you and your family through whatever you may need. God Bless you and may He give you some rest and peace.

  18. Peace to you. You are ALL wrapped in the cloak of God’s grace and love together. In this season of thanks, I know that having known, adored and loved Ezra will be at the forefront of your minds. Celebrate that! God bless~

  19. I just don’t know….except…that God doesn’t waste anything. There are so many of us in addition to you and your family that are being forever shaped by this experience. At times we might have to fight hard to make sure we let it shape us for His glory. I commit this to you, my dear sweet little brother in Christ, I will use little Ezra and all you have shared for His glory! Just as you and Robyn want so much to be able to have little Ezra buried into your chest, snuggled right up under your chin, God too wants you to lean into Him, lay your head on His chest and let Him hold you while you grieve and cry yourselves to sleep.As you dissolve into one big heap, He can and wants to hold you. Charles Spurgeon says that our groans must be the sweetest music to His ears.If you get cried out and can only groan, groan away my friend. Our Heavenly Father’s heart breaks for you. What an awesome God He is to not hit the panic button and send Jesus now! How awesome He is to give more precious time so others can be saved…others we know and love and want in Heaven with us and you three and Ezra and his other little brother. We should all rejoice that it is not my hand on that panic button!

    Praise God that Charley is doing so well!Many blessings upon you and your family. I looked forward to meeting you one day. Such an honor to read your journey. Thank you for being brave when you didn’t always feel like it.

    Praying that you all will find rest! Jesus is still King of Kings and Lord of Lords. Amen and Amen.

  20. I prayed so hard for you and Robyn this weekend to find comfort as you celebrate Ezra’s life. Ever since the day he went to heaven, this little guy has been on my mind and in my heart. I shed tears more than once daily for this little guy I’ve never met. Ezra is my hero. Knowing his story has made me a better wife and mother. My family is already committed to financially supporting Ezra’s cause.

    Love to your family,
    Annie

  21. hey Kyle and Robin.

    Just so you know, Karen and Me have been praying for you all and will continue to.. I sang today in the church im at.. The song is called “You Are my Strength”.. by Hillsong…and I dedicated that song to Ezra .

  22. You words hit like a falling house… So many of us experience Christ the way we see others responding to life and not by knowing Him, clinging to the hem of His garment and unless circumstances bring us there (where we cannot breathe with out Him) we may never truly know Him. He brought me there, he brought you there… I was sitting the other day watching my twins play together and mourning your losses – heck, I feel like they are my losses as well – and wondering how in the world a child dying from cancer could be allowed by God. At that moment the Holy Spirit must have been reading my thoughts because it came clear – not the reason for the cancer per se, but rather this whole human experience. The explanation of it was so deep and written into only the part of my soul that is connected deeply to Christ that I have found it difficult to put into words but you have found a way to do it. I dare say because your pain and your loss are so desperately deep that you are still swimming at a depth I have not been to yet. Your faith deepens mine, your son Ezra caused me to lose my breath and hang on to Christ and all He needs us to be with such desperation that I will never again be where I started.

    I am here to continue the fight with you to get childhood cancer out in the open and to get researchers fiercely fighting for a cure.

    But rest now – Rest in Christ’s love – let it wash over you and Robyn and Charley and all those who love you.

    Praise the name of Jesus Christ and all He has done for us.

    I love you all and continue to pray. I will continue to remember and love your little boy who fought valiently and saved many lives.

    Love,

    Gena Clark

  23. We have been praying unceasingly for you and your family since we read this story a few months back. We are still praying for you Robyn and Charley as you move forward as hard as it may be. I can’t say I know what you are feeling cause I have never been there, my heart is heavy even trying to imagine what you have gone through. Thank You for having the courage and strength to even get out of bed, but even more to share you pain wit all of us. You and Robyn Inspire me to fight the unknow battles that God lays before us, knowing not what may come out of them but that there is a reason…I pray that so much love and maybe a cure can come from all that you and Robyn have done. You ahve to start somewhere you have made me aware so thats one more person then before also there are hundreds others that are now aware! So Thank you again from the bottom of my heart I will continue to follow your story. Will keep you Robyn and Charley in my Prayers! Jeremiah 29:11-13, was the verse we used on our wedding stationary, It always picks me up.
    God Bless~ The Kleins

  24. Kyle and Robyn, I like so many other people have been trying to find the right words but I cannot. I want to say I am sorry for the loss your family is feeling – it is not fair. I also want to say thanks for allowing so many people the chance to know you and your family through this site. I can honestly say I am glad to have met you and little Ezra. Thank you 🙂

  25. Kyle & Robyn, First of all my deepest condolences to you. Thank you so much for sharing Ezra’s life through this website. I am so blessed & a stronger person because you were willing to share Ezra’s life story and your testimony of faith that carried you through this heartbreaking time. May the Lord continue to fill you with His strength from this time forward.
    I will be there to help you in the fight to wipe out childhood cancers.
    I’m so happy to hear that Charley is doing so well, he is very cute!!

    May God bless your family–continuing to pray for you.

    Caryl

  26. All I can say is Ezra is such a gift! I hope you are able to publish your writings one day. God has used Ezra’s life, and your lives to impact so many. Through your writings you have allowed us to fall in love with this precious little boy and now I so miss him as if he were my own. May God’s presence surround you each day as you remember your life here on earth with your little boy. Please do keep us posted on Charley’s life. So glad he is doing so good!

  27. I have never met your family and was introduced to you all about 3 weeks ago via a link that my friend posted. I have been hooked on your page ever since.. sharing the joy, pain, sadness, but most of all strength. I am struggling with my faith right now and you all have been a huge help in softening my heart so it is not so “jaded”. You are all AWESOME..

  28. I am so amazed at the faith you have after all you’ve been through. I don’t think I would have been as strong as you are wow . I wished I could have been at Ezras celebration of life yesterday but I live to far away. I will be looking forward to watching the video once it’s posted. Once again we all send our thoughts and prayers to you and your wife. Ezra was so blessed to have you both as wonderful parents. I’m glad to hear that little Charley is doing well . He looks chubby and cute 🙂 Thank you for sharing your story your friends are right you should right a book. Good night and God Bless.

  29. Dearest Kyle and Robyn,
    We have known you two have enough to do and are so mentally, and physically exhausted, not to even mention grief stricken and probably a bit still in shock as to having a few extra minutes here and there, not knowing what to do with them until you realize you will find something soon to fill those gaps of time. I sorely understand your grief, and I actually feel guilty still grieving over my daughter since she passed on Dec. 1st 2000. The reason I feel guilty is like I explained to Dave, your Dad, I was and am so VERY BLESSED to have had her for all those (almost) 38 years. It just makes me feel so greedy when I still mourn for her, while you had your babies such a SHORT period of time. In the respect of having her for all those years now makes me feel so Very Blessed. Perhaps I should just let go and Celebrate her LIFE. Hope this doesn’t sound a bit strange, you won’t find a truer person of heartfelt feelings and emotions as I am.
    I SO MUCH wanted to be there, and could have been but have been so ill for the last (December will be) 3 years and no one seems to know what I have, it is a true mystery..however I in no way wanted to spread anything around (although evidently not contagious) just in case someone had a very low immune system and perhaps would or could catch whatever I have. Your Dad and I have been in close contact so prayerfully he has conveyed to you and Robyn our Sincere Heartfelt Grief.
    Words are not possible for me to tell you of the love, admiration, respect, pride, and so many more emotions I have for both you and your beautiful, faithful and loving wife.
    Just know our prayers and faith are constantly with ALL.
    Hope to follow with help in your foundation!
    Blessings with smiles across the miles to you.
    Aunt Sharon & Uncle Daniel Riehl

  30. Your dad simply nailed it on the head when he said “When I grow up, I want to be like Kyle and Robyn” Ezra’s fight and courage, along with you both as parents and your outlook is completely humbling and is exactly what changes the world. Be encouraged that you do NOT have a group of people standing behind you that think the fight is over. The fight has only shifted gears and glory to God will continue to be revealed time and time again. We ARE an army ready to support you and the causes put in place! And to be changed to live how Christ always planned for us to live. What Ezra has done is simply nothing less than completely amazing! Ezra will not be forgotten. I want to frame his sweet little face in our home to remind us what he has done for our family personally and what is left to do in our world today! God’s Blessings to you three 🙂

  31. I just could not say it it any better. Much love

    “Lisa De Santos says (on November 15, 2010 at 12:28 am)

    I am so amazed at the faith you have after all you’ve been through. I don’t think I would have been as strong as you are wow . I wished I could have been at Ezras celebration of life yesterday but I live to far away. I will be looking forward to watching the video once it’s posted. Once again we all send our thoughts and prayers to you and your wife. Ezra was so blessed to have you both as wonderful parents. I’m glad to hear that little Charley is doing well . He looks chubby and cute 🙂 Thank you for sharing your story your friends are right you should right a book. Good night and God Bless.”

    Aim us Mathews clan, and we will gladly fight the fight.

  32. You have fought a fight that many of us will never fight. And in my eyes Id say you have won. What an awesome story you have and yet to come. I’m so excited man to see how much more God will use your experience to reach millions around the world..literally…
    My family stands ready to fight this ugly beast with you..my brother spent most of his childhood fighting Leukemia and it angers me to the core. I have seen first hand, just as you, the hardships childhood cancer brings.
    I tell people all the time about your family, you’re an inspiration t faith hope and love

  33. We wanted to attend Ezra’s service but illness stopped us. My son attends the zone while I am in service and he said to me that day..”Mommy I need to go, I loved that little boy.” He is only 11 and has never met Ezra but felt like he had forged a bond with him at church and here on your blog.
    We are ready to stand and fight with you. You hit the nail on the head when you said “I hope you’ve seen it’s not always smiling children on a commercial, but is also broken families, extreme struggle, and painful loss.” God bless you Kyle, Robyn, Ezra, Charley and Price. I feel that I am a better person because of you. You have not only touched my heart but my soul. Thank you, Ezra’s story has changed ALOT of people, myself included. This in itself is a miracle. <3

  34. so thankful that you have shared this very bittersweet journey with all of us. The Holy Spirit has knit so many unexpected strangers together through this. YES, I know that God is still doing miracles. May God bless you and keep you and may His face shine upon you and give you peace.

    Marcy

  35. Thank you for humbly including us in Ezra’s celebration. We were in awe of you, of your dad, Lindsay, Mandy, Abby, and Pastor Chris as they put so wonderfully to words what we all know Ezra is to you and all of us, as we’ve gotten to know him these past 14 months. We are changed, forever, for the better, and we stand ready to beat down the childhood cancer monster with you. No family should ever have to endure this again. We won’t stop praying.

  36. I am once again, so touched and moved by yours words. You and Robyn are such a testament to God’s grace being able to overcome all. We cannot wait to help your foundation and to see the wonderful fruit that will come out of it. We will continue to pray for you and yours. Cannot wait to see new pictures of your sweet little boy, Charley. =0) God bless.

  37. Well- you guys have received emails/comments from me through this process. I am one of many “strangers” whose life was touched by Ezra. Getting to know him “virtually” sparked a fire in me to join the fight against Neuroblastoma.

    I don’t know anyone personally who has suffered Neuroblastoma, but for some reason felt a connection to Ezra. I look forward to ways I can join you and Robyn in raising the awareness and funds we need to increase the focus on this. I am so glad that there is now 80% survival rate for childhood cancers like leukemia, but 30% survival for neuroblastoma is simply not acceptable. Less than 3% of all government cancer research funding goes towards childhood cancer. Leukemia receives the bulk of that 3%. There are still thousands of children suffering and dying- and those few who do survive Neuroblastoma, suffer life long complications from the treatments. This HAS to change.

    Thank you for posting updates- I think about Ezra and your family every day, and it helps to get the updates. I look forward to being able to see the service.

    All my best to you, Robyn and Charley.

  38. you both need the time to rest, recuperate and bond with charley. when you are ready you have an army of love and determination behind you. we will not let ezra down. lots of love and hugs for you, robin and charley.
    chrisann

  39. To show your son honour, my family and I went to chuck e cheese’s, I wore a fluorescent orange shirt! We prayed along the way for you guys and the service, even if there was a time difference we were going at the approx same time as the “celebration”.
    His picture remains on our fridge like any other cousin in the family, God’s family. We love you. Be at rest Matthews family, we are in for the journey to come. love, the Ashworths/Utslers

  40. Dear Robyn & Kyle~
    This post meant a lot to me. I have always been nervous to come up and talk to you two, mainly because I did not feel worthy enough nor strong enough to talk to you. I tried to be strong on Saturday, but I lost it and I felt as though I didn’t say anything of any importance to you two. Robyn, when you hugged me, I felt it was genuine, I felt as though we have been friends for years! Your hug alone sent this surge through me and I knew right then and there that you are not only someone I want to get to know, but you are someone I want to model my life after. I hope that one day you will give me another chance to talk to you (this time I promise I will speak coherently:o) ) God says to not promise anything you can’t keep, so I am promising to fight side by side with you and Kyle to find the cure for childhood cancer. Ezra is not your “normal” child, there is something EXTREMELY special about him and I felt that the first time I read his story. I have a big mouth, I have a big heart and I plan to use both to raise awareness and funding for Ezra’s foundation. I look forward to meeting Charley (those cheeks are so cotton-pickin’ cute!!) and I look forward to re-meeting you both:o) God bless your family & as always, please do not hesitate to ask us for anything, we’ll find the means to help. We love you all.

  41. Beautifully written! What a testiment you and your family have, glad to know you see the “big picture”. Living our lives more Christ like, a challenge we all need to take on.
    May God bless you and your family during this painfully raw time in your lives. Better things are yet to come!
    Love, Brandi

  42. I’m just heartbroken…I know so many feel a pain in knowing your story and having followed Ezra’s story and prayed for all of you. I cannot imagine what it is like to navigate and walk through saying goodbye to Ezra even knowing you will see him again. I’m so sorry for the heartache. There are so many bearing up under the weight of this tragedy in prayer for you and pulling for you and your family. Ezra is such a special boy and a gift to many. Thank you for sharing him with us!! With love – Thea

  43. Ezra; a mighty little man, who commanded the attention of so many and who made most of us fall to our knees. There is evidence of his life every where I turn at Grace an beyond. And I suspect as we all take up our shields and swords for the fight against childhood cancer, he will be in our hearts forever.

    I am here to help you.

    Leslie Novak
    813-598-4864

  44. I still pray for you all every night. It’s become a habit. Your faith is inspiring, as is the outpouring of love you’ve received. I agree that we all have to look out for each other, and really genuinely love each other. And forgive each other. Anyway, I shared your story with my mom and she told me never to forget that people would often trade their troubles for mine. It’s a humbling lesson. Thank you for the daily reminders. Love.

  45. I was not able to attend this weekend, but know that my thoughts and spirit were with you and your family. I have and will continue to pray for your family and that of all the families who are going through similiar struggles. I want to take the time to thank you for sharing your laughs, questions, and struggles with all of us. You have opened our minds and hearts to Ezra and none of us will ever be quite the same, I am deeply sorry for your loss but he will always be in your hearts.
    I look forward to continuing to fight at your side for childhood cancer. If there is a will there is a might, and you all certainly have all of us forever at your side.
    God bless you all <3

  46. You guys are so special to me – i just don’t have the words. I get overwhelmed emotionally just thinking about all of you. My emotions overtake me when I actually speak out loud about Ezra and his glorious parents. Kyle and Robyn – I love and care for you both so much and your precious Charley makes me smile. My mind gets swarmed with so many different things I would like to convey to you both. You’ve allowed all of us to know you and your children – I just love Ezra so much and don’t want to talk about him in the past tense – I am not ready. I tried to give myself closure by sending up balloons to the heavens for your boys and honeslty it helped for that day and I am grieving for Ezra as if he were my child. I know he is no longer in pain or suffering but……there’s always a but – I want you to have your child back and i want to meet him and hug him and read books with him and play Blue’s Clues. I’m so sorry I don’t have the strength, I am trying but it’s not coming so easily. I know I’m babbling so I should stop but I want you to know my heart and it’s out there for you….Matthews Family.
    I am here for you in whatever way you need. I support all causes and the future foundation in Ezra’s name to fight childhood cancer.
    I’m am beyond sorry for the loss of your children, if I had the power to make it all better I would.
    I hope that one day we can come together and meet.
    My whole heart is crying for Ezra…..I’m so sorry
    My prayers will never stop!!
    I love your Charley and anxiously await more pictures of his cute chubby growing up so fast self!!
    All my love, Tammy

  47. I was at the service with my neice and my daughter it was so beautifully touching and moving. All of my families prayers are with you in the time, and know that Ezra’s life has impacted many. We will definately be standing beside you in your future battles against childhood cancer. May Gods Love hold you up.

  48. As has been said so many times (by me, and by others) you are still being bathed in prayer.

    I feel so blessed to have been part of this experience and journey with you (however small). It has caused me to see God in an even bigger way; to see more of His strength, His love, His power, His hope. Thank you (and Robyn) for your honesty, your willingness to share with God’s family. I am so glad to be able to call you my brother and sister in Christ.

    May He continue to bless you richly, and hold you up in the days to come. Always remember to be grateful for Ezra and how you got to see God’s love through him and the circumstances throughout his life. He is a special, much loved little boy – that will NEVER change. I can’t wait for the day when I can meet you both, Ezra, Price, and Charley – if not in this life, then in the next!

    So much love to you all,
    Kara

  49. Kyle, God has given you a gift to proclaim truth…raw, real, gut wrenching truth. Thank you for your diligence in sharing, your transparency, your labor in writing. Thank you for reminding us of why the church remains on planet Earth. Thank you for encouraging those who are striving to fight the good fight and finish the race set before us.
    May God,the Father continue to shepherd you, Robyn & Charley, may Jesus Christ continue to intercede on your behalf, may the Holy Spirit comfort, direct and empower you to accomplish great things for the kingdom.
    We love you!

  50. Ezra, you are a warrior little friend! You continue to keep everyone united in prayer. Kyle, thank you for continue to share your journey with us. I can’t wait to see pictures of Charley! I know he’s got a huge smile for his brother right now. And all of you have a perfect Guardian Angel now to protect you! May God continue to bless you and keep you.

  51. Thank you so much for sharing your experiences and your faith with us all. It is truly inspiring. I hope you continue this blog to keep us updated on Charley! I’m so glad to hear he’s doing so well.

  52. Kyle, Thank you so much for your writing.. it is such a gift from God. Its so amazing how much Jesus holds us at all times. I really hope you and Robyn wrap yourself in His love and rest. Jesus has a love that nobody can surpass. We will all be here to help you in your cause for a cure when you are ready to use us. I know God will be glorified in all this. I continue to lift you all up. Jesus can handle all the burdens as He did for all of us on the cross so we can see each other again. Thank you JESUS!

  53. As far as I live (Qc Canada), I cannot stop to think about you and your two beautiful angels. Hope for peace and comfort and pray for a cure ! Love from Canada

  54. Praying for you, and your family. Rest in Him. Know your ordeal has not only touched thousands of lives, but has inspired and revived true faith. He was, He is and He will be. God bless you and your beautiful family!!!

  55. Your family and Ezra have never been far from my mind and heart. My husband has never been a man that is really moved to tears. He always tells me that he’s just not “emotionally wired that way” and didn’t even cry at his grandma’s funeral. However, he has shared LOTS of tears with me over Ezra.
    One day, you will all be together again–for eternity. It’s hard to grasp the conception of time when we judge it by our time on this earth; it seems so long to wait. However, in the big picture, it is only a blink of an eye.
    This is the hope (and my strength) I hold onto every day when I think of my daughter, Lynlie.
    I will be checking back often to information on the foundation you will be starting. I’m ready to help!

  56. Thank you for allowing us to celebrate little Ezra’s life. What a beautiful way to honor him and God, who gave him to you for that short time here on earth. Not a day goes by that I don’t think about you guys. You will still be in my prayers.

  57. This post moved me to tears. Thank you for sharing your family and your struggles with everyone. I am moved beyond what I can perfectly say by your thoughts and actions in the face of this trial. You are an amazing family and Ezra was a beautiful and amazing child. Your family is and will always be in my thoughts and prayers. I will keep watch for news of your future foundation. Love from Kansas.

  58. I continue to pray for you all. A day does not pass that I don’t think of all you, pray for all of you and think about Ezra. Erza has changed me forever. I am here, along with some many others, ready to continue to fight Neuroblastoma with you…in Erza’s honor.

  59. You family has moved me to tears many times and the sadness I feel is only lightened thinking of Ezra’s smile in heaven at peace, pain free, and a typical little boy. You are among the strongest people I have ever known and you have changed my life and affected my family in ways that you will never know. Thank you for sharing your story with me. I plan to contribute whatever I can to Ezra’s cause.